Patience

I thought that the first 2.5 years of Mary's life had taught me patience. The months of colic, her not napping/sleeping well or through the night, her wanting to be attached to me 24 hours a day for the first year and a half of her life, and now the "why?" stage. There's nothing to do but take a deep breath and remind myself that this too shall pass.

Firecracker is taking my patience to a entire new level. First, it took us months to get pregnant. Then, the first 4 months of the pregnancy I had such bad sciatic nerve pain that I honestly just sat and cried sometimes. It felt like I was dying. It was worse than labor, and it hurt all the time. For the past 3 weeks I have been having contractions for several hours on most days. They started out as annoying and uncomfortable. Now they are painful. Yesterday they were every 3 minutes and got up to 30 to 45 seconds long for about 8 hours. And then I went to bed, and here I faced with another day of waiting, of sitting here with no energy to do anything. I thought yesterday was the day for sure. By the end of the day I was so mentally and physically exhausted that I was hoping I wouldn't have the baby last night. I know I didn't have enough energy to deliver a baby last night. And so, I wait.